Shoulders

I write this post with tears streaming down my cheeks…a grieving of injustices and tragically misguided understanding of the value of life for those with Down syndrome. And as I reflect on the future I expect to give my daughter, I also weep from the overflow of gratefulness for those whose shoulders I stand on. I pray that my participation in history will create a better world for future generations of children living with Down syndrome.

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Foreshadows

Married and talking in hushed tones as our daughter Madeleine slept in her nearby crib, Russ grabbed the antlers from his nightstand. His rough and slivered hands caressed the tines and he humourously asked, “Which one do you think Madeleine is?” I giggled at his seemingly ‘crystal ball’ approach to the set. His hand found it’s way to the smallest tine at the bottom of the antler…

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Binge

The Parent's Guide to Down Syndrome

Over the next 48 hours, I binge watched Youtube and every single clip that had anything to do with Down syndrome (Ds). I watched countless families stories, a day-in-the-life-of home videos, educational clips about Ds, and the options went on and on. Some of the videos were encouraging, hopeful and honest. Others were discouraging, ambiguous […]

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Diagnosis

The next day we drove back to Spokane for the scan and a chat with Tanya. I felt the emotions of the day brimming at my eyelids as we drove and talked. When a good friend had called me a couple years ago to tell me he had ‘just the guy’ for me, he described […]

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Results

As promised, Tanya called me back on Tuesday. Her call came late in the afternoon and Russ was home. I handed Madeleine to him as I glanced at the familiar number on my phone and I perched on the couch, looking out the window. I half wished I’d grabbed our calendar to remove the guesswork […]

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Birthdays

The statistics of risks associated with maternal age, do not communicate this same enthusiasm for baby endeavors. At 35 years old, a woman steps into a world where the numbers begin to tumble and risk of having children with chromosomal abnormality climbs. Although pregnancy is trending higher among 30+ women…we are considered ‘advanced maternal age’.

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Tests

I arrived at Sacred Heart’s Maternal Fetal Medicine clinic on January 4th. I was 14 weeks pregnant and only just starting to show evidence of a bump. A friend had come to help me with Madeleine. As we sat in the waiting room, I looked at the other pregnant women and wondered what circumstance had brought them there. My mind wandered into that query and I could only imagine their worse case scenarios. I, on the other hand, expected a one-time visit and confirmation that our little one was developing perfectly- just as Madeleine had.

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Clearblue

In January, one week before my 36th birthday, we found out that our little one is being ‘knit together’ with an extra 21st chromosome, also known as Down Syndrome. We have experienced all the ‘feels’ as we’ve received this diagnosis and adjusted our expectations to this reality. There are many unknowns ahead, but we are certain of this- that God who began a beautiful, good and perfect work in us…..is faithful to complete it in HIS way, for our best.

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